How Often Do Men (and Women) Cheat?

[Image from heartandsoulreflections.com]

We have seen a lot in the news media lately about the topics of adultery and children being born out of wedlock.  I would imagine some of you are immediately thinking about the case of former Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger.  I have certainly posted here about issues presented by his separation and alleged infidelity lately!  But, of course, Mr. Schwarzenegger is not the first wealthy man to admit to infidelity, or to get caught "running around," is he? 

As Augusta, Georgia divorce attorneys, we often see allegations of adultery, cheating, or "fooling around."  In this divorce law blog, we have also occasionally discussed the amount of proof which is necessary in order to prove adultery, which is a fault ground for a divorce in Georgia.

But just how common is adultery?  According to once source, http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/, between 30% and 60% of all married people will commit adultery at some point.  (Do you believe the actual number of cheaters is at the high end or low end of this range?)  In addition, up to 3% of all children are allegedly the product of an adulterous relationship.  And get this, according to this source, most of these children who are born out of wedlock are unwittingly raised by the married partner who is not their biological father. 

I guess the point of this post is that, while we may read about celebrity adultery, these celebrities certainly did not invent it.  "For better of for worse," adultery and children being born out of wedlock are quite common and occur in all parts of our society.  They always have been and always will be.  What do you think?

Celebrity Divorces and Separations: Schwarzenegger and Shriver

[Photo from Wikipedia]

Yesterday, according to various news reports, a representative for former Governor Arnold Scwarzenegger announced that the actor and former governor will delay his film career comeback.  Apparently, he is simply temporarily putting his acting career on hold while he deals with troubles associated with his separation from Maria Shriver, his wife of 25 years.  At the same time, various news reports further indicate that Ms. Shriver has reportedly hired a California divorce attorney.

Who knows what might happen next in that ongoing salacious celebrity saga.  But let's lay aside the specific facts of that situation and talk a little bit about similar issues confronted by other "regular folks" going through a divorce or separation.

Mr. Schwarzenegger's delay of his movie career illustrates a problem common to many separating or divorcing couples.  Don't you agree that it would be tough -- both emotionally and time-wise -- for anyone to attempt to deal with a separation or divorce, while also attempting to juggle job pressures and deadlines?  Just imagine how tough it would be for you to have to go to work every day, while also dealing with child custody and visitation issues, along with financial pressures common to most divorces?  But the point is that, generally, most "regular folks" have no choice.  They must deal with both -- the pressures of their split-up and their job pressures.  Most folks cannot put their day jobs on hold. 

So, arguably, while no separation or divorce is easy, at least the former governor can afford to take some time off while he confronts his personal life's challenges.  That is good for him.  But that is a luxury that many divorcing couples simply cannot afford.  What do you think?

Back To Divorce Tip Basics: Documenting Everything!

[Image from librarythinkquest.org]

Okay, okay!  I realize that this is not merely a divorce blog about celebrity divorces and separations!  Instead, I know that I am only an Augusta, Georgia divorce attorney who primarily focuses on writing about practical divorce tips for you to discuss with your own divorce lawyer!  Maybe I have just gotten too carried away, recently, by all the big news reports coming out of California about the separation of former Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger and his spouse, Maria Shriver!

But today, let's get back to basics!  Let's talk a little bit about the importance of documenting things while you are going through a divorce.  (Of course, this post assumes that you have a private, secure place to make and keep a journal.  Please first ask your own divorce lawyer about this issue before you do anything.) 

For example, let's assume that you and your worthless spouse, "Sluggo," are going through a series of problems dealing with child visitation.  The point here is that you should regularly document each of these problems in a journal, notebook, or some other writing.  For instance, if Sluggo tells you, on Wednesday, that he will pick up the little darlings on Thursday, and then he fails to do so, and he doesn't even call you, then you should write it all down.  Document it!  Later, you can show your journal to your divorce lawyer.  And don't you see the potential benefit?  The important benefit is that, if you, unlike Sluggo, have documented, by date, each problem, or confrontation, then later, when you get to court, your attorney might very will be better prepared to prove your side of the case!

Can't you visualize your divorce attorney grilling your spouse on cross-examination?  "Mr. Sluggo, isn't it true that, on February 12th, you agreed to pick up the kids on the 13th, and then you failed to show up?"   

So, please consider, with your divorce lawyer, the idea of documenting all your encounters, or problems, with your spouse!  Now, I wonder if there is anything else new in the Schwarzenegger separation!

Biggest Celebrity Divorces and Separations: Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver

[Photo from Wikipedia]

Wow!  Just when you thought things were bad enough for former Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger, we now hear the news reports today in which Schwarzenegger reportedly acknowledges a past alleged relationship with a former household staff member and that this relationship produced a love child a decade ago!  You will recall that, earlier, this past week, the former governor and his wife of 25 years, Maria Shriver, had publicly announced their separation.  Thereafter, we have now heard this stunning revelation today about the alleged cause of the celebrity couple's split.

Hopefully, the paparazzi will honor requests made by both Schwarzenegger and Shriver for privacy for her and the couple's four children.  Of course, we can also hope that the media will also leave alone the former staff member and her child, too.  But we won't hold our collective breaths, will we?

As we have seen before, it is bad enough when things like this occur in the marriage of any average citizen.  And adultery, infidelity, cheating, "fooling around," or whatever you want to call it, do occur "out there," don't they?  But perhaps the public scrutiny and, in particular, the relentless probing by the paparazzi, often only compound the problems in celebrity marriages.  In many respects, this is a sad situation with complicated issues.  Hopefully, the parties involved will be able to address the tough issues involved, as best they can.  Don't you agree?

The Goolsby Law Firm "Brag Board"

[Goolsby Law Firm, LLC]

I hope you don't mind if I, as a proud father, boast a little bit again today about my four children!  As you may know, currently, I practice law in Augusta, Georgia with my oldest son, Richard H. Goolsby, Jr.  At the Goolsby Law Firm, LLC, we handle divorces, child custody, step parent adoptions, and many other types of family law matters, along with personal injury cases, and other general litigation.  In addition, because I am a former federal and state prosecutor, we also handle criminal defense in federal and state courts.  (I am the only former 20 year federal prosecutor in Augusta, Georgia).  In other words, the former prosecutor is now a criminal defense attorney and divorce lawyer!

But that's enough about me!  Today, I want to brag about the fact that my third son just graduated, summa cum laude, from the University of Georgia.  Also, he has been accepted and will begin his first year of law school at UGA in the fall.  In addition, my second son has just completed his second year of law school at another outstanding Georgia law school, at Mercer University.  Both my second and third sons plan to join my oldest son and me at the Goolsby Law Firm when they have completed their legal studies! We will truly be a family law firm!  Finally, we are also very proud of our daughter/sister who is graduating this week from high school.  She is arguably the wisest member of our family because she is our only child/sibling who does not want to become a lawyer!

Biggest Celebrity Divorces and Separations: From Tiger Woods to Arnold Schwarzenegger



[Photo from Wikipedia]

As you know, this blog primarily focuses on practical divorce tips and information about divorce which you should discuss with your own divorce lawyer.  We are The Goolsby Law Firm, LLC -- father and son divorce attorneys -- located in Augusta, Georgia.  But in this blog, we also try to "jazz it up" a bit by discussing issues presented by various celebrity divorces and separations which might also help you with issues in your own divorce.

Another common thread or theme which runs thoughout this divorce, or family law, blog concerns the fact that Hollywood puts a lot of stress on celebrity marriages.  This has always been true, don't you agree?  And it is equally true that Hollywood is always producing bigger and bigger divorce cases!

Just look at some of the high profile celebrity divorce and/or separation cases we have witnessed in the past year alone!  For instance, in the past year, we have seen, among others, the divorces of Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren, and Sandra Bullock and Jesse James, along with the separations of Larry King, Courtney Cox, Elizabeth Hurley, and many other celebrities.  And now, according to news reports, (and as we discussed yesterday), we are apparently witnessing the separation of actor and former Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver. 

Which recent celebrity divorce or separation, in your opinion, has attracted the most attention?  Which recent celebrity divorce or separation surprized you the most?

In conclusion, it appears that some things in life just never change: death, taxes, celebrity divorces, and blogs about family law and celebrity divorces!



Celebrity Divorces and Separations: Schwarzenegger and Shriver

[Photo from Wikipedia]

Did you hear the latest celebrity news from California?  According to various reports, actor-former Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger and his spouse, Maria Shriver, have separated.  Of course, with the former governor moving back into acting, after a busy political career, this is a time of stressful transition for the couple.  According to reports, they have been married for 25 years and have four children.

At this time, the couple has reportedly only separated.  Divorce has not been publicly mentioned.  Only they should know about or decide what happens next.  But doesn't this case once again illustrate that celebrity couples generally face the same issues as other couples?  Career changes and other life transitions can be difficult for anyone.  However, celebrity couples must also contend with the added stressors associated with public life, too! 

Here's hoping that, after 25 years of marriage and four kids, they will deal with the transition and find the right answers for them!  

Happy Mother's Day: "A Mother's Day Memory"

                        [Photo from connect.in.com]

"A Mother's Day Memory"

          By Richard Goolsby

Oh, to think of Mother's hug,
Evokes a sentimental tear!
My heart strings pull and tug,
As Mother's Day draws near!

When I was young and ill,
She would rock me through the night.
That old rocker squeaked and squealed,
But still, she held me tight.

I can feel her arms around me,
As she held me late one night.
I can feel her love surround me,
Mother's love makes most things right.

I can see her -- just above me,
I can hear her voice, so clear,
And the words to "Jesus Loves Me,"
From her lips down to my ear.

Yes, it's true -- my mother's gone,
But it's also true, you see,
My mother still lives on,
In my heart and memory!

Happy Mother's Day to all moms "out there!"

Celebrity Divorces: Marie Osmond

                               [Photo from Wikipedia]

Have you heard the news reports about popular singer Marie Osmond?  According to various reports, earlier today, she remarried her first husband, Stephen Craig, in Las Vegas, (where she is currently performing with her celebrity brother, Donnie Osmond).  Significantly, Ms. Osmond and Mr. Craig had been married before, in 1982, and then they had divorced, in 1985.  The couple had one child, who is now reportedly 28 years old.  Ms. Osmond also had another previous marriage to another man, prior to today's remarriage, which had also ended in divorce, about four years ago. 

According to http://www.healthcareinfo.org/ and other sources, roughly  55% of men and 44% of women over the age of 25 generally remarry after a divorce.  Of course, one can reasonably guess that only a small percentage of men and women end up remarrying their former marriage partners after a divorce.  After all, unlike in Osmond's case, if you ever get free of your own worthless spouse, "Sluggo," you aren't likely to want to get hitched with that ole' nag again!

Here's hoping that Ms. Osmond and her "new-old" husband find happiness together again!

Celebrity Divorces: James Brown

                                                   [Photo from Wikipedia]

Today is the birthday of James Brown, the late, great singer and "Godfather of Soul!"  Brown, who grew up in Augusta, Georgia, (where I am a divorce lawyer), was born on this date in 1933.  The still popular American icon died on December 25, 2006.  While alive, Brown was noted for being "the hardest working man in show business."  Locally, Brown was also well respected for his charitable work, including an annual turkey give-away each Thanksgiving.  Brown never forgot where he came from!

Like many celebrities, James Brown also experienced some marital problems, which, according to Wikipedia, resulted in two divorces.

But today, as an Augusta, Georgia lawyer, who is proud to be "living in America," (which is the name of one of Brown's biggest hits), and who is also happy to live in Mr. Brown's hometown, I mainly just wanted to recognize him on his birthday!  Happy Birthday, James Brown!